When I'm no longer fat, I look forward to being able to bend over without feeling like my eyeballs are going to pop out. Am I the only one that feels this way? I don't remember feeling this way when I was smaller, so I'm going to attribute it to being fat. Therefore, I'm assuming I won't feel this way when I'm no longer fat.
But do you know what I mean? When I bend over to pick something up, I get quite a bit of pressure on my eyeballs/temples. It's like there's too much weight on my head. It's weird, I know.
Saturday, January 30, 2010
Friday, January 29, 2010
Things that I look forward to when I'm no longer fat.
Of course there's the obvious:
-I'll be able to handle more physical activity
-I'll be able to shop in normal size stores
-I'll be healthier for my kiddos
etc, etc, etc.
But lately, I've been thinking about all those, what some might call, "little" things that I look forward to when I'm no longer fat. Well, they're not little to me, and I look forward to not dealing with them any more.
I'm almost exactly 6 weeks away from my surgery, and I'm starting to get butterflies, especially because I realized yesterday I'm only a month away from starting my pre-op diet. I know in my heart I'm making the right decision, but sometimes I wonder what the hell I'm doing to myself.
That being said, I'm going to try to self-motivate (as I don't have any followers) by posting a "thing that I look forward to when I'm no longer fat" every day. And not the obvious ones, either. That's too easy.
So here's mine for today:
When I'm no longer fat, I look forward to being able to put my shoes on in a public place without fear of embarrassment.
We've all been to places we're you're required to take your shoes off: the bowling alley, the jump balloon at the pumpkin patch, you're friends house, etc. Well, I hate having to put my shoes back on in public. I can't really reach them well, at least without bending over to the side. Or I can lean against something and forcefully hike my foot up on my knee, and throw the shoe on real quick before I fall over, or pass out because I can't breath. Well, I don't want to do that anymore. When I'm no longer fat, I'll just sit down, lean forward, and tie my shoes, without making a scene. Seems simple enough, but it's something that uses up valuable space in my mind.
-I'll be able to handle more physical activity
-I'll be able to shop in normal size stores
-I'll be healthier for my kiddos
etc, etc, etc.
But lately, I've been thinking about all those, what some might call, "little" things that I look forward to when I'm no longer fat. Well, they're not little to me, and I look forward to not dealing with them any more.
I'm almost exactly 6 weeks away from my surgery, and I'm starting to get butterflies, especially because I realized yesterday I'm only a month away from starting my pre-op diet. I know in my heart I'm making the right decision, but sometimes I wonder what the hell I'm doing to myself.
That being said, I'm going to try to self-motivate (as I don't have any followers) by posting a "thing that I look forward to when I'm no longer fat" every day. And not the obvious ones, either. That's too easy.
So here's mine for today:
When I'm no longer fat, I look forward to being able to put my shoes on in a public place without fear of embarrassment.
We've all been to places we're you're required to take your shoes off: the bowling alley, the jump balloon at the pumpkin patch, you're friends house, etc. Well, I hate having to put my shoes back on in public. I can't really reach them well, at least without bending over to the side. Or I can lean against something and forcefully hike my foot up on my knee, and throw the shoe on real quick before I fall over, or pass out because I can't breath. Well, I don't want to do that anymore. When I'm no longer fat, I'll just sit down, lean forward, and tie my shoes, without making a scene. Seems simple enough, but it's something that uses up valuable space in my mind.
Thursday, January 28, 2010
What got me thinking about the Lap Band
I've struggled with my weight my whole life. I haven't always been overweight, but during those times that I was "normal," I definitely struggled. I always had a sinking feeling that when the time came for me to have kids, I'd never be able to control my weight. Maybe it was a self-fulfilling prophecy, but here I am, done having kids . . .and about 100 lbs overweight.
My whole family is overweight - immediate family, aunts, uncles, cousins, grandparents, etc. A good portion of my family also has weight related problems, some have died because if it, some WAY too early.
Anyway, about a year ago, I had recently failed yet another Weight Watchers attempt, and was watching an episode of Big Medicine. The sister/daughter of the two doctors had gotten a Band, and she weighed about 190 when she got it. That show made me realize that the Band isn't exclusive to SEVERELY overweight folks.
Well, I did some research, decided that I really wanted to do it, and broke the news to my hubby. He was shocked, but soon came around to the idea that my health is worth major surgery. My insurance has an exclusion for bariatric surgery, so we knew immediately that we'd have to pay for it ourselves. We're far from wealthy, so we had to wait until this years income tax return (we withhold way too much throughout the year)to afford it.
I've told my immediate family and my in-laws, but only because they have to keep my kids while we're in Denver. Otherwise, no one else knows, not even close friends. I think I'm like most in that I don't want the whole curious world watching over my shoulder to see how I handle this thing. They'll find out soon enough, I'm sure.
That about sums it up. Welcome to my first blog post ever. I've been reading other band blogs, so hopefully I can learn even more from the blogging/band community by having my own.
My whole family is overweight - immediate family, aunts, uncles, cousins, grandparents, etc. A good portion of my family also has weight related problems, some have died because if it, some WAY too early.
Anyway, about a year ago, I had recently failed yet another Weight Watchers attempt, and was watching an episode of Big Medicine. The sister/daughter of the two doctors had gotten a Band, and she weighed about 190 when she got it. That show made me realize that the Band isn't exclusive to SEVERELY overweight folks.
Well, I did some research, decided that I really wanted to do it, and broke the news to my hubby. He was shocked, but soon came around to the idea that my health is worth major surgery. My insurance has an exclusion for bariatric surgery, so we knew immediately that we'd have to pay for it ourselves. We're far from wealthy, so we had to wait until this years income tax return (we withhold way too much throughout the year)to afford it.
I've told my immediate family and my in-laws, but only because they have to keep my kids while we're in Denver. Otherwise, no one else knows, not even close friends. I think I'm like most in that I don't want the whole curious world watching over my shoulder to see how I handle this thing. They'll find out soon enough, I'm sure.
That about sums it up. Welcome to my first blog post ever. I've been reading other band blogs, so hopefully I can learn even more from the blogging/band community by having my own.
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